It has been brought to my attention that certain outlets are selling what appears to be "Hazelnut Snickers".
DO NOT BE FOOLED!
These are not the real Hazelnut Snickers, instead, they are Fake Chocolate - a mixture of baby poo and smashed gravel, with a hint of Ebola Zaire.
ACTION REQUIRED:
If you see these so-called "chocolate bars", please contact your local Hazelnut Snickers Quality Enforcement Officer (ie: me) so that they can go to the location and remove them from sale personally.
Stay safe. Stay aware.
Rest assured that in these troubling times, such fake items will be destroyed with extreme prejudice.
Thank you for your compliance.
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